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Women have always had a glorious history of enjoying sex toys. I suspect women’s sex toy traditions go back centuries before plain paper packages. I think the joy a woman gets from her vibe or dildo is in many ways more fulfilling to her guy than it is even to her. The point is this: men want women to enjoy deep satisfaction from their sexuality. A women’s enjoyment of her sexuality is really an important part of male sexuality, and that’s why men buy sex toys for their lovers.
We guys are always on the hunt for something new — new adventures, new places to explore, new toys and we love to share what we find with our beloved. That’s just the nature of guys.
When it comes to shopping for sex toys, there’s another factor besides adventure — mischieviousness. I bought a couple toys in a sex shop a while back before I ever bought anything on line. I bought a beautiful red jelly cock ring with these great nubs. It keeps me really hard and gives her incredible pleasure. I also bought her a mini vibe. It’s a wonderful little gadget that does all kinds of cool stuff.
I told a couple of friends about my visit to this shop and my purchases. I had to grin at their reaction. “You went where? You bought what?” I’m not sure what exactly drove me or surprised my friends, but I do know that there’s as much adventure in buying it as there is in trying it. I’ve got to say, it’s been fun. I’m a regular on-line shopper now. I’ve found some great buys and fun sex toys on MyPleasure  . Check it out yourself.
The days are changing, though. Now, I think male sex toys are as popular as those for women. And ladies are buying them for their guys. There’s a new attitude about sexuality. It doesn’t have as much of that mischievious overtone to it any longer. It’s almost as common for a woman to buy her husband a masturbator online as it would be for a guy to buy his wife a vibe or some flavored lube. I still think men are the main shoppers, though. Remember there’s that driving adventure.
Sean
Orgasmic Guy
 This one is contributed by Mitch Hiker. I think he’s got a handle on the multi-orgasmic technique and he’s no doubt seen more than a few. Thanks for the imagination candy, Mitch!
Get ready to tease your senses with Kama Sutra candy.
If you can do this, you will have mastered the multi-orgasmic art of self-control. You’ll be able to accomplish anything.
1. Unwrap one of those Halloween bite-sized Snickers bars
2. Pop it in your mouth
3. Suck on it until it’s nothing but peanuts.
4. No chewing allowed.
All of your body’s organs will scream at you to chew, chew, chew. But with all of the discipline you can muster, you slowly let the candy bar melt away. First the chocolate goes, than the gooey stuff, and finally the humble little peanuts. Life will never be the same again.
When you are done, you can chew up the peanuts if you want to.
Now, do this together with your wife. Get in to that hot tub, close your eyes and flood your senses. Neither of you will be the same.
Mitch
 You know we give Eve a lot of crap for leading us guys like the pied piper down the lane of original sin. What if Adam had simply said, “Thanks I’m not hungry right now, but can we make love?” I’m really wondering if a lot of pain in our world would be avoided if we simply made love with our wives instead of doing — whatever — shopping; renovating the basement; watching a DVD; talking about the neighbors. Lose all the junk in life and make love. I’m not saying think about it, talk about it, read a book about it or even suggest it. Just do it. Nike kind of stuff.
Eve gets the raspberries because she had the dreaded conversation with the devil and couldn’t resist the urge to bring home a bag of his delicious apples. She offered the stuff to Adam. The point is that you don’t have to take everything offered to you in life — even if it seems relatively harmless. Renovating the basement could be harmless, but if it means you don’t make love, it’s deadly. Unfortunately, I think sexuality gets squeezed out of life because there are so many other things that seem important but really aren’t.
Possibly Adam was afraid of how he’d look if he didn’t take what Eve was offering him. Chicken. Who knows if she’d have called him a loser or not, but he buckled. They should have been making love. They’d have been on the same page, thinking the same thoughts, holding the same life values. She’d have known it wasn’t his thing to eat devil apples and she’d have never bought them. She’d have been at home with him doing it on the beach.
Or maybe Eve was bored. She and Adam weren’t all that intimately involved and she had too much time on her hands and had the conversation with the devil and probably even asked his advice. If you’re married and you’re not acting married, sooner or later one of you is going to have that conversation with the devil and you’ll fall sucker to the devil’s solutions. You’ll come home with apples. And since Adam was the kind of guy to say, “Well, if it’s what you really want, honey — well, ok,” they didn’t right there roll in the ferns. They should have. We’d all be better off today.
If God created me, my body and my mind, then He created all the sexual passion that’s rushing through me. Don’t tell me it’s a curse, of the devil, or something I’ve just got to “get over”. There’s a reason for it, and I think every guy would do well to find out just why God left him with this raging fire inside.
It’s in vogue to be a modern, sensitive kind of guy these days, but I think it’s a little bit contrary to how we’re cut out. That testosterone is the stuff that gives men the strange characteristics that make men … well men!
Men are risk takers, love danger, and more often than not, ignore pain. Testosterone is what makes us aggressive both in business and in bed. It’s what gives us the ability to persuade someone into a big buck contract as well as persuade our dear wives to make love on the beach under the stars. Risk and conquest. Danger and innovation.
Really, it’s the guy that needs to keep the passion ablaze in a marriage because it’s his God-given, male, sexual aggression which captures the softer, safer sexual nature of a women. Men are physically created for aggression: his penis gives and takes control while her vagina receives and submits to his love. Knowing that makes us confident in our role. Passivity and the modern, sensitive, caring guy isn’t always the best way. Kindness is always right, but a sexually passive guy lets sexuality die.
In the same way, it’s the man who recreates the sexual relationship in a couple. Just like the creative side of a woman creates and recreates a home, the guy keeps sex interesting. Think of it — you bring home a new sex toy and she looks at you cross-eyed. “You want me to do what?” Hey dude, don’t be dissuaded. It’s your God-given role in the sexual relationship! Paint the picture bigger, bolder, better! She’ll love it. Give it time.
Some days a guy just stuns himself with absolute genius! The other day was fast becoming a real drag. Work was tedious at best and not much was going the way it should. And I just wasn’t happy. Never been there?
 I decided to try something. What was pure depression quickly turned out to be pure genius. I slipped in the other room took my Aneros Helix prostate massager, lubed it up and slipped it in. That sucker just reached out and grabbed my prostate. I nearly doubled over in pleasure. It has that fantastic little bump on the front of it. I felt a shudder run up and down my body, regained my composure, pulled my jeans back up and went back to work.
Sure, I’ve always used my Aneros for just the Aneros — you know, you lay down, concentrate and wait for the Super “O”. It never occurred to me before to simply enjoy it while I was busy doing something else. My day went tons better because every time I moved, my prostate got a little nudge. I could squeeze my Aneros Helix, give my prostate a big nudge and smile.
Sexuality isn’t something that’s saved for a moment, experienced in a moment, and forgotten until the next. My Aneros moment reminds me that sexuality, like spirituality is a realm we live in always.
OG
Sean
I remember when I was a kid and I’d have an erection in the morning, I had to do acrobats to pee in the toilet. It scared me because I thought something was really wrong, and there was no way I was going to ask anyone about it.
Who thought up this morning hard-on thing anyway, and why are we guys blessed with it? Sure sometimes it’s really pleasant to wake up feeling aroused raring to go, but if you’re not exactly a leisure morning person it really gets in the way. It’s a hassle if you’re bunking with your buddies — say hunting or fishing — and you get up in the morning with a stick in your undies. Did you ever try to hide it? That’s a trick. Where in the heck do you put it when it’s three times it’s usual size and hard as a rock? It’s not like no one else ever gets one, but I think it’s just not polite to flaunt your morning stiffy.
A couple of years ago a guy in Europe told me that the slang word for morning erection in one Scandinavian language was the same word as evening milk and cookes in another Scandinavian language. I can see where that could complicate international relations in some settings. Especially, if your bud over the border invites you to join him for a spot of tea and cookies in the evening. I’d politely decline.
It’s a disappointment though when the old pal down there doesn’t greet you in the morning. Actually, it can be a sign of stress, fatigue or other possible concerns. Don’t take that too seriously, though. Guys have phases that come and go and if the boy doesn’t get up when you do, don’t give it too much thought. Just get more sleep.
Really, the morning salute is an assurance that it’s six o’clock and all is well. All systems are “go” and you can anticipate another great day.
OG,
Sean
It never ceases to amaze me what power sexual tension has — sometimes to the point of becoming irrational. And this can be a good thing. In love, concepts like reason, logic and moderation diffuse what we really want and need in a sexual union, namely boundless, wild passion.
Think about the word passion. It has as it’s root the word pass or passive. Usually we think about passion as involving a lot of action and assertiveness. Really, it’s the opposite. We don’t take control which is why sexual passion is so attractive because we leap in with our wife with no foresight, no plan, no expected outcome, no recommended guidelines and let it all happen to us.
And as we’re falling, turning, twisting with our love, we do crazy and irrational things. It’s wonderful, because it’s the one place in life when between a guy and his gal reason and moderation have absolutely no place. The power of the passion is absolutely liberating and energizing.
Here’s succumbing to the power of passion.
OG,
Sean
Yesterday, we went for a photo shoot requiring that we leave at five in the morning in order to catch the sunrise in a remote wildlife area. It rained all the way as we drove in the dark. Once we arrived on the lakeshore, there was a hint of light and the cranes, geese, swans and ducks were already making a raucus noise. The lake was incredibly beautiful, peaceful and serene. The rain had quit for now, and we set up our cameras on the shoreline wondering what kind of a spectacle we’d witness as the clouds were moving quite a bit. In themselves, they were a piece of art as they whirled and swirled above like a marble cake along the eastern horizon.
We waited about thirty minutes and then the sun began to reveal itself over the east shore of the lake. We started clicking and adjusting and clicking our cameras some more. It was spectacular. Then the cloud over us opened up and showered us with cool rain. I was prepared with a raincoat and I pulled my camera under my hood to try to keep it dry. The rain drops first formed little circles all over the water and then it poured and the water danced alive.
I realized that, though it was raining, the sun still shone across the lake. I looked over the bank behind me and sure enough there was a rainbow and the birches blazed with yellow and gold in the first light of the morning sun. It all lasted about three minutes. Then the rain quit, and the sun was up, and the rainbow faded.
 I often think of certain life situations in term of a sexual metaphore. This moment was no different. When the rain stopped and I was finished trying to capture all the moments with my camera, I thought to myself, “Sheeze! This was almost orgasmic!” It was orgasmic as I was overwhelmed by the beauty that was unfolding before me and I wanted to capture it before it slipped away, and as I began to get my arms around that beauty all of a sudden I’m seeing these splashes as the rain began to fall. It wasn’t one of those moments when you say, “Oh shoot, now it’s raining.” No, it’s more like, “My gosh and this, too? It’s too much. My God, stop, it’s too much!”
A guy will agree that an orgasm is such. You anticipate a beautiful experience and you’re prepared to wrap your arms around the experience with all of it’s sensations and emotions, and then when it arrives with a rush, you lose all sense of control as everything washes over you. You’re lost in it, whirling, swirling, and it carries you away and there’s nothing you can do.
You know, we want to control our orgasm and make it into something more or better –what we think it should be. When you think of it in the metaphorical sense like I mentioned earlier, would life really be all it is and as beautiful as it is if we could control all of it? I mean, sure you set goals and achieve them and find your way in life and get what you want. But there are those things that you could have never dreamed of which come your way, pick you up and carry you off in a dizzying, extatic orgasmic rush.
As much as I work on making my sexuality all that it can be, I still love the huge surprises that come in all aspects of my sexuality. Sexuality in 5.1 surround sound. Lay back, close your eyes, and wait for what it brings. You’ll ask it to stop — for just a moment.
OG
Sean
Yesterday it didn’t rain — until later. That meant we had to trim the trees or forget it as after next week it will be too late and we’d be stuck with the brush all winter. So, I got one of those pole saws that reaches twelve feet, borrowed a friend’s extension ladder and climbed around on the house and trees trying to saw off all those dangling limbs threatening to rip my roof off.
We recently bought the house and I don’t think the previous owner had cut limbs for years. The yard looked like a jungle. It was nice and shady and private, but you know those kinds of homes. Who exactly lives there? What goes on in there? It’s spooky and mysterious.
We ended up with a huge pile of limbs, branches and brush, but the yard looked, airy and inviting; not to mention that I’m not worried about the roof getting trashed by the branches brushing back and forth and ripping off shingles. We feel better about our yard and feel like we can move and work in it. Today, my wife planted a whole bed of perennials — russian sage, black-eyed-susans, cone flowers. It looks fantastic!
I recently read a chapter of a book by Julia Cameron where she was advising artists who never finish anything to organize their studios and lives in order to finish. So often we artists don’t finish anything because we’ve got too much clutter around us and in our heads. We’ve got tons of projects started, ideas simmering and research begun, but very little crawling over the finish line.
I’m arriving at my point. I’m not much different in my sex life than I am in my art life. Since for me sex is a really creative part of my life, I treat it much like art — it’s a sort of art where the medium is relationships. The problem is that I’ve lots of sexual ideas, sexual things I’d like to try and stuff stewing on the back burner, but unfortunately, much of it is for later or when I think through that idea better. The worst thing you’ve probably done several times yourself: you wait until “the moment is right”. Do you have any idea how often the right moment comes along? We guys are usually sleeping or playing video games when the right moment occurs!
Like art, some of the most beautiful and exhilirating experiences occur without much prior planning. You move the stuff aside that gets in the way, spread out your stuff and say, “Let’s create some sex!” You just do it. Like me with my trees in my yard, now I can move around and breath. I can go here and go there without getting tangled up. Sex is the same. You’ve got to get the stuff in your life that gets in the way out of the way. Then you can breath, move, think and feel clearly. Your sex life is without clutter and distraction.
Try it! Clean up. Organize. Get sex out of the jungle.
OG,
Sean
I’ve had this joking banter with a friend recently about being flaccid. It’s a joke really. The word has an interesting sound to it, and like it should, it sounds weak, limp. Contrast the sound of flaccid with tumescent (swelling). Every guy would rather be tumescent, right? Isn’t every man’s dread to grow flaccid at an inappropriate time. It’s an absolute hellish experience. In the film Alfie, Jude Law has a series of sexual encounters during which he loses his erection and slinks away, rejected in total disgrace. He lost his dignity, but even more it seemed his identity was slipping away.
What started as a joke between me and my friend — here’s to you flaccid guy! — became for me a really big question: Is a rock hard erect penis really better than a flaccid one? Put another way, does a guy really find his sexual identity in his erection or even more basic, in his physical sexual ability?
What it boils down to for me is a definition of the Orgasmic Guy. Is the Orgasmic Guy a guy who can raise an erection at will and keep it till he’s finished? Sounds pretty good, but really I’m wondering if what really defines an Orgasmic Guy, a fufilled sexual male, is an attitude. I don’t think it’s what he can do, but who he is.
A guy uses his abilities to express his manhood not prove it or define it. If he can build, he builds. If he can play football, he plays football. If he can write, he writes. None of these things defines his manhood. His manhood is defined in his attitude — how he does it. I suspect the same goes for a guy’s sexuality. It doesn’t define him. He expresses himself through it.
There’s nothing like a really hard erection — especially if it comes unexpected — wahoo! But you know I can love flaccid, too. Really.
OG — That’s me,
Sean
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